


Monsters are real (it's our job to deal with them)

by elletromil



Series: Family [2]
Category: Kingsman: The Secret Service (2015)
Genre: Canonical Character Death, M/M, POV Second Person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-02
Updated: 2015-04-02
Packaged: 2018-03-20 19:57:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,450
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3663018
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elletromil/pseuds/elletromil
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You don't remember your parents.</p><p>You have this vague impression of warmth and arms wrap around yourself, echoes of happy voices and phantom caresses of gentle fingers on your cheek.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Monsters are real (it's our job to deal with them)

**Author's Note:**

> So here's companion fic to Life goes on. This one is centered around Roxy because she is a bamf who deserves all our love.

You don't remember your parents.

You have this vague impression of warmth and arms wrapped around yourself, echoes of happy voices and phantom caresses of gentle fingers on your cheek.

But that might as well be a dream.

You only know the cold touch of medical instruments, the glare of cold eyes, the rough touches as they strap you on the bed.

*

You wake up to angry yells and flashes of light in the corridor.

Your door opens but you do not move from your bed. You know punishment is the only thing waiting for you if you try to hide.

But the man coming into your room isn't one you've seen before. He's dressed in a nice suit instead of the lab coats you've grown used to see. He looks at you and something unidentifiable passes on his face before it sets on a gentle expression. He comes closer slowly, with his hands up and you cannot understand why.

"If you don't mind, I'll be carrying you outside," his voice is soft, but what surprises you is that he addresses you directly. You're far more used to being ignored. For a moment you don't know what to do, but the man stays where he is, patient, and it's his patience that decides you. You forgot what it was like and you find you've missed not being rushed.

You nod, still a bit hesitant, but reaches out your arms to wrap around his neck as he comes nearer. "Now wraps your legs around my waist, yes like that, and hold tight. Also keep your head against my throat, don't look."

He keeps an arm around you, the other extended, gripping a firearm and leaves the room cautiously. Nevertheless, soon the loud noises and flashes start anew, but you're not afraid. Even if his face takes on a hard set, the few times he looks down to you, his eyes are warm.

*

"What is your name?" he asks you and you want to answer but you just don't know.

So you shrug, but instead of looking disappointed, he gets that pensive look.

"Hmmmm... You'll really need a name though. What about Elisabeth? No, you don't look like one. Suzanne? Oh my goodness, Merlin no! Wait! I think I got it. What do you say to Roxanne, Roxy for short?"

It takes you a moment to realise he's waiting on your opinion. Once you understand you nod eagerly. Anything is fine by you as long as you're called something.

"Roxy it is," you don't regret your decision when he smiles brilliantly. "No Merlin, not that. I chose her first name, he should have something too. And 'Roxanne Morton' as such a better ring to it."

You do not remember your parents, but now you have a name.

*

You wake up from a nightmare and for a moment you think it was all a dream and that you were never saved.

You're wrong of course, but you're still afraid, under the impression that at any moment now the people in white coats from before are coming to get you.

You’re frozen under your covers until you remember what you’ve been told the first day James brought you home.

"I won't insult you and pretend monsters aren't real. You know better than most of us that they are. But if you're ever scared, you come to us. We're Knights, it's our job to deal with monsters."

James isn’t there tonight, he’s left to deal with far away monsters, but Richard is in their room. You’re both still wary around each other, but as soon as you slip under the covers and mumble something about nightmares, he wraps his arms around you.

"I'll protect you with my life."

He says it with the same confidence James had when he walked down the corridors of the horrible place he freed you from and you cannot do otherwise but trust him too.

You do not remember your parents, but you think they would have felt a lot like this, like _safety_ and _affection_.

You don't get nightmares anymore, but sometimes you pretend you still do, just so you can slip into their bed in the middle of the night.

*

You start calling them both _daddy_ , because that’s what they are.

James asks you what you want to be once you’re older and beams when you answer you want to be a Knight like them.

Richard looks at you, _scrutinizes_ you, but when you only meet his gaze with resolve, he nods solemnly.

“You’ll need training.”

*

Your dad tells you Lancelot’s died, that your daddy won’t ever come home again.

Sometimes the monsters win.

You hold each other and you cry in shared pain.

Never again will a sparring session suddenly turn into a dancing lesson, the two of you twirling around the room to a hummed song until you’re interrupt and you sit in a corner to watch your fathers waltz.

You won’t ever receive tacky gifts that made him think of your eyes or your smile that he bought in some small market in a country you hope to visit one day.

You’ll never get home to the sight of your daddy lying with his head on your dad’s lap, looking like an oversized puppy, and just sneak under his arm, falling asleep covered in the blanket of your parents’ shared love.

“Still interested in being a Kingsman?” he asks much later and when you answer the only way you could have, you don’t think you’ve seen him more _proud_.

*

You meet the other candidates and you scoff internally. They won’t be a challenge.

You’re mostly right, but some of them are good and the tests are harder than you ever could have thought.

You get more and more scared as there are fewer and fewer candidates, but you’re glad to see Eggsy stays in the run.

If you fail, you hope he’ll be the one taking up Lancelot’s mantel.

You know your dad would have adored him.

*

You shoot your dog and you become the next Lancelot.

There’s no time to welcome you properly among the Kingsman because Galahad dies and Eggsy poisons Arthur and you are so _relieved_ when Merlin tells you he’s legit, because you know you would never have been able to shoot him.

You could shoot your Queen because you _knew_ they could not ask you something so horrible of you, because you grew up with Serenity and Gunshot as your companions.

But you couldn’t have shoot Eggsy, because you do not believe for a second that he is one of them, that he is one of the monster you promised yourself to hunt so no one else ever has to wake up alone in a dark room.

*

You don’t directly get your revenge, but it’s all right.

Eggsy tell you all about his fight with Gazelle and how she died and the only thought in your mind is _good_.

“Thank you.”

He doesn’t know why you’re thanking him, not really, not yet. But he accepts it and drags you a bit closer to him to tell you the rest of it, his arm around your shoulders and you go willingly.

You don’t judge him later, once the reality of it all comes crashing down hard on him and he cries into your shoulder, a name silently mouthed on his lips.

He never told you who was Harry to him and he doesn’t need to. Your father and him have the same sadness in their eyes.

*

Eggsy laughs and laughs when you get the call a few days later that Galahad, that _Harry Hart_ , is still alive.

You laugh with him, never once envying him his happiness.

*

You go on your first mission with Percival and you’ve never felt so alive than when you’re running down corridors with him.

Your mission is a success and you get home without a scratch.

You go on your father’s grave, leaving a small trinket you bought in a colorful market in the country you just saved from destruction.

It had made you think of his laugh and when your dad sees what you left on the ground he _laughs_ for the first time since James left and never came back.

You feel as if you’ve vanquished your first true monster.

*

You remember being a nameless little girl with no memories of your parents, afraid of monsters in white coats.

You know now that you are Roxanne Morton, that your fathers would have protected you with their lives, but that they trusted you to defeat any monster coming your way.

You know that their love for you was as deep as your love for them.


End file.
